


If at first you're a bit of a prat, review, review again.

by chamaenerion



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Coffee Shops, Enemies to Lovers, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-31
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:47:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27856189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chamaenerion/pseuds/chamaenerion
Summary: When Arthur writes a negative review of his experience at a nearby coffeeshop, he expects that will be the end of it. He'll get his morning coffee elsewhere and try not to think about the attractive barista who took his order. But that plan falls through when his review gets an unexpected response.
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 19
Kudos: 182
Collections: Merlin Holidays 2020





	If at first you're a bit of a prat, review, review again.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [fried_extracrispy_trenchcoat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fried_extracrispy_trenchcoat/gifts).



> This is my first Merlin fic and I was so excited by all the prompts that it was hard to narrow it down to one idea! I had a lot of fun with this and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Happy Holidays!
> 
> Many thanks to my beta, M! You had to put up with a lot these past couple of weeks and I really appreciate it <3  
> Naturally I kept poking at this after it was beta'd so any remaining mistakes are my own. 

The coffeeshop Arthur typically stopped at every morning on his way to the office was closed for the first time in the two years since he'd found it. He stared at the sign apologizing for the inconvenience, eyes glossing over the explanation about a burst pipe. There was no way he could make it through that morning's meeting without caffeine. He walked on, tapping on his mobile to locate another option that was close enough to work that he wouldn't be late.

There weren't many options. He settled on The Round Table based on it's 4.8 star rating.

The moment he walked through the door he realized he had made a poor decision. It was too late to turn back now, however, and the dire need for caffeine propelled him towards the counter. He walked past tables full of hipsters with their laptops and black coffees, multiple rows of Edison lights, and walls with scripted quotes ranging from "Take a walk on the wild side!" to "Keep your feet on the ground when your head's in the clouds".

There was only one customer ahead of him, but he used the time to check on his schedule for the day and hoped that he wouldn't have to work through lunch again.

The woman moved to the side to wait for her order and Arthur stepped forward to take her place without looking up from his screen. "Large flat white, extra shot" he said to the barista. He frowned at his online calendar.

"Name?"

"Arthur," he said. He held out his credit card, still distracted as he switched to checking his email just in case his father had decided to move up their meeting again.

"Um," the barista said, "I think that's the wrong-"

Arthur looked up sharply. "What?"

His breath caught, just for a moment, when he saw messy dark hair, sharp cheekbones, and smiling blue eyes looking at him.

"Your card," he said, gesturing to Arthur's hand.

Arthur glanced down to find that he was holding his identification instead of his credit card. His cheeks flushed and he quickly pulled the right card out of his wallet.

"Don't worry about it," the barista said with a wide smile. Arthur got the sense that he was being laughed at, and he didn't much care for the feeling.

"I don't intend to," he snapped.

The man, Arthur squinted at his name tag, _Merlin Emrys - Manager_ , raised his eyebrows.

"Will that be all?" he asked, matching Arthur's tone.

"Yes." Arthur snatched his card back and waited for his coffee as far from the register as possible.

He checked the time and swore. The moment his order was ready Arthur grabbed it and all but ran for the door.

Somehow he managed not to splash himself with the drink as he hurried down the street, into the building, past security, and into the elevator headed for the 43rd floor. He hit the button and finally allowed himself to take a breath. And then a sip of his coffee, which he almost spit out.

That must be the worst flat white he'd ever tasted. Assuming there was espresso in the cup at all- all Arthur could taste was lukewarm milk.

He exited the elevator and glanced longingly at the kitchenette down the opposite hall. There was no time to make a fresh pot of coffee. He sighed and turned in the direction of the conference room. He would just have to make do with the tragedy he had bought and paid for.

-

Later, on his very late lunch break, Arthur was still annoyed with his disappointing coffee. He looked at the half empty cup on his desk and decided he needed an outlet for this frustrating day.

He looked up The Round Table on his laptop and clicked on "Leave a review".

**1/5 stars. Ordered a flat white and left with nothing but steamed milk. Discourteous staff. Will be taking my business elsewhere in the future.**

He closed his laptop, feeling somewhat unsatisfied and trying not to let his mind wander to _Merlin Emrys - Manager_ and the way Arthur's heart had stuttered when their eyes had met.

It wasn't ten minutes before Arthur's phone pinged a notification that the owner of The Round Table had posted a reply to his review. Well, that was unexpected.

**Arthur, I'm sorry to hear that your visit was less than satisfactory. If you decide to give us a second chance I'm sure we could improve your opinion, next drink on the house of course. Sincerely, Merlin Emrys G.M.**

So much for not allowing his mind to wander.

-

Arthur planned on his coffeeshop being closed the next morning and left his flat a few minutes early so he wouldn't have to rush. He briefly considered searching for another place to buy his coffee, he even thought about heading straight to the office and stealing some of Morgana's imported beans, but as long as he had an excuse for visiting The Round Table again what was the harm in getting a second look at the manager? There was no guarantee that he would see Merlin again, but at least he would get a free drink out of it.

He pulled open the door and was met with a scene identical to the one he'd walked into the day before. If he had to guess, he would say that half of the customers were actually the same ones he'd seen. He glared at the sign proclaiming "A coffee a day keeps the grumpy away!" as he made his way to the counter.

Merlin looked up with a smile that widened comically when he recognized Arthur.

"Welcome back!" he said. "Can I remake your order from yesterday? I'm sorry about that, by the way. I've been training some new staff which unfortunately can lead to a few mishaps."

Oh, Arthur had assumed Merlin had made the awful flat white and was fully prepared to give him a piece of his mind. He felt a little off kilter. Which had absolutely nothing to do with the way Merlin's eyes scrunched at the corners when he smiled.

"That's... alright?" he said.

"It'll be right up, Arthur." Merlin gestured for him to wait at the other end of the counter.

Arthur tried to concentrate on his emails as he waited, but he kept glancing up from his phone to watch Merlin move around the kitchen as he prepared Arthur's order.

Somehow he missed when Merlin set his drink on the counter because the next time he looked up the cup was there and Merlin was back at the register speaking with another customer.

Swallowing his disappointment Arthur grabbed the coffee and left for work.

It wasn't until he was sat at his desk that he saw the message written in a messy scrawl on the side of the cup.

**Let me know if it's up to your standards. - M**

Followed by what was clearly his number.

Arthur considered his options as he took a cautious sip of the drink.

It was perfect.

He texted the number.

_[Sent 07:54] Adequate._

Arthur had to muffle a laugh an hour later as he walked down the hall when Merlin's response came.

_[Received 09:15] [Image description: A close up photo of Arthur's online review that put emphasis on the 1 star.]_

He paused outside of Morgana's door to to update his hasty review.

**2/5 stars. Adequate.**

_[Received 09:19] Thanks a lot!_

He tucked his mobile back into his pocket and entered Morgana's office. Something must have shown on his face because she did a double take.

"What's so funny?" she asked.

He found he was reluctant to mention Merlin and the coffee. "It's nothing," he said. He sat in the chair across from her and fought the urge to check his mobile. "I wanted to go over the projections for December..."

-

Against his better judgment Arthur once again found himself at the entrance to The Round Table the following morning.

He hadn't texted Merlin again despite typing out and then deleting half a dozen messages, so he was looking for an excuse to talk to him again.

There was a long line this morning, likely due to it being a Friday. He waited impatiently and was glad that he had left his flat early again, but the line was nevertheless cutting into the time he wanted to spend at the coffeeshop.

Once he was close enough that the display case and signs weren't blocking his view, he saw an unfamiliar person working the register. His heart sank, which was ridiculous. He tried to fight back his disappointment.

"Good morning," the woman, Gwen according to her name tag, said cheerfully. "What can I make for you today?"

"Large flat white, with an extra shot" he said, and paid. "Thanks."

"Can I get a name for the order?"

"Arthur."

Gwen's smile widened. Rather suspiciously, Arthur thought.

"That'll be right up, Arthur," she said, but instead of turning to the many machines behind her she left through the back door.

Arthur moved down the counter to wait, and he was startled from his emails by a familiar voice.

"I'm going, I'm going. What's the problem, Gwen? Oh."

"Redeem yourself," Gwen said, giving Merlin a little push in Arthur's direction.

"Can't stay away, can you." Merlin smirked at him.

"What can I say, I live for the thrill of disappointment."

Merlin rolled his eyes and checked the order Gwen had written on the cup labeled "Arthur". "Do you drink the same thing every day?" he asked.

Arthur bristled at his tone. "So what if I do."

"Variety is the spice of life, my friend."

"We're not friends."

"No, I could never be friends with someone so boring."

"Excuse me?"

Merlin pointed at him with the cup. "Let me make you something different, I promise you won't regret it."

"No, but you might."

"What are you going to do, knock a star off your review again?" Merlin shrugged. "I think I'm willing to risk it."

Arthur considered him, feeling off balance at once again being on the receiving end of that earnest blue stare.

"Alright," he challenged, "let's see what you've got."

Five minutes later, Merlin presented the mystery drink with a flourish and a bow.

Arthur fought back a smile. He took the cup and turned for the door. "This had better be good or you owe me a refund," he said over his shoulder.

"You're not going to try it before you go?" Merlin asked, and when Arthur glanced back he would have said he looked disappointed.

"I'll be late to work," he said. He raised the cup in a salute and stepped out onto the cold city street. That wasn't entirely the truth, he had plenty of time for a leisurely walk to work. But Merlin was becoming a distraction, not necessarily an unwelcome one, but he must have checked his messages twenty times yesterday in case Merlin had texted him again. The end of the year was an important time for his father's company, and Arthur couldn't afford to lose focus at work.

He waited until he was in his office before he tried the drink. It was... very similar to what he typically ordered, but somehow vastly improved.

The subtle caramel warmed him from the inside out. He held it cupped between his cold hands for a long moment.

He wanted to text Merlin.

 _Not the worst drink I've ever had_ or _If I ordered this every morning would you still consider me boring?_.

But, no. No distractions. He kept his mobile facedown on his desk and got to work.

-

He got home late that night, re-heated the leftover Thai food in his fridge, and collapsed onto the couch.

No new messages from Merlin. That annoyed him. Wasn't he curious if Arthur had liked the drink he made?

He fought the urge to text him. He fully intended to visit the coffeeshop again on his day off tomorrow anyway.

Before he went to sleep he pulled up his review to post an update.

**3/5 stars. If you look past the hopelessly hipster vibes, maybe it's not such a bad place to start the day.**

-

Merlin wasn't at The Round Table the next morning. Neither was the barista, Gwen, who had recognized him yesterday.

Arthur ordered his usual and gave his name to the teenager at the register, and then walked down to wait for his order feeling ridiculous and bothered by the anticlimactic turn of events. He turned to look at the door every time it opened, hoping to see Merlin, but it was never him.

Arthur took his drink and sat at an empty table.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he took out his mobile and snapped a photo of his cup so the order written on the side was clearly visible. He sent it to Merlin with a frown emoji. He sipped at the drink and frowned himself. It was rather plain.

It was almost ten minutes before his phone vibrated with a notification.

_[Received 08:04] why are u up at this time on a SATURDAY_

_[Sent 08:04] I'm always up this early._

_[Received 08:06] good for u now shut up_

Before Arthur had time to respond another message appeared.

_[Received 08:06] why are you sad about ur drink_

_[Sent 08:09] You didn't tell me what you made yesterday, so I wasn't able to order it again._

Arthur winced at how much that revealed, but it was too late now.

_[Received 08:10] you liked it! I knew you would_

_[Sent 08:12] Yes but that does me no good when you're not here to make another one._

_[Received 08:13] I'd rather not work 7 days a week just to serve your caffeine addiction_

_[Received 08:13] you'll just have to wait till Monday, goodnight_

_[Sent 08:14] It's 8 in the morning._

_[Received 08:15] and whose fault is that_

Arthur got the distinct impression that it was his. He smiled and drank his coffee.

-

On Sunday Arthur made coffee at home with his shiny and sleek and hardly-used espresso machine. Even the addition of his favorite creamer wasn't enough to take his mind off the cravings he'd been fighting all weekend. He wanted another of those caramel drinks almost as much as he wanted to see Merlin again.

He already had his number, what was stopping him from simply texting him? Asking him out to drinks or dinner?

He typed out a message, but then deleted it. He continued with this pattern throughout the afternoon before he gave it up for a lost cause.

He would contend himself with seeing Merlin Monday morning.

-

Arthur entered the coffeeshop to a now familiar sight. He was certain he even recognized a few of the customers sat at the tables near the window. One of the quotes on the chalkboard wall had changed to: "Good mornings start with coffee". Arthur couldn't help but agree.

"It isn't hipster, it's modern," Merlin said instead of greeting him.

Arthur was in too good of a mood to argue. "Whatever you say, Merlin." He smiled.

Merlin blinked at him twice before prompting the total on the register.

Arthur handed over his card and deliberately brushed their fingers together when Merlin handed it back. Arthur couldn't be certain in the dim, golden light of the incredibly hipster Edison bulbs, but he thought he saw a blush creeping up Merlin's neck.

Later that night Arthur finally plucked the courage to ask Merlin out.

_[Sent 19:20] I know how this sounds, but would you like to get coffee with me this weekend?_

_[Received 19:27] I don't know, it's only Monday. Are you sure you won't be sick of coffee by Friday?_

_[Sent 19:31] Do not underestimate my caffeine addiction._

_[Received 19:32] sorry clearly forgot who I was talking to. Coffee would be great :)_

Arthur released a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. He never would have guessed that this is where he would end up after that first visit to The Round Table. Maybe it was time for another update.

**4/5 stars. I always end up coming back for more.**

It occurred to him that he never checked to see if his favorite coffeeshop had ever reopened. He plugged in his mobile to charge through the night, and left the question unanswered. It hardly mattered, he thought as he drifted off to sleep. He'd much rather see Merlin every morning.

-

Three weeks later found Arthur at the coffeeshop again after work, as was his new habit, to meet Merlin. They were going back to Arthur's tonight for curry and a movie.

When Merlin saw him he laughed. "I didn't realize it was snowing." He leaned over the counter to brush some of the snowflakes out of Arthur's hair. "Let me just get my coat and we can go."

Arthur glanced over the display case while he waited. There was a little sign in the window that said "Rate and follow us on social media!" with a list of handles. It reminded him that there was something he'd been meaning to do. He slipped his mobile from his pocket and pulled up the review he'd left before.

**5/5 stars. Best coffee and baristas in the city, don't let the decor fool you. You won't be disappointed.**

He hit submit and waited for Merlin.

"You know I get a notification for every review, right?" Merlin said with a grin as they left the shop

Arthur reached out to adjust Merlin's red scarf, just for an excuse to step closer. "Yes, I know."

"I know you secretly like the motivational quotes. I've seen you taking photos of them. I can get you some for your office if you want."

Arthur refused to acknowledge that his lock-screen currently said "How do I take my coffee? Seriously.". He took Merlin's hand and gave it an affectionate squeeze. "Shut up, Merlin."


End file.
